Today, we’re going to talk about telemarketers. Can you say telemarketer? Do you know what a telemarketer is? They are the rude people that call when you’re on your way out the door running late to work or spending time with your honey or eating dinner with your family or something else you’d rather be doing than wasting time on the phone with someone you didn’t want to talk to in the first place. The phone is ringing and ringing like a teapot that won’t stop and you have to run and get it so it’ll shut up. You finally get to it and pick it up and it’s a stranger asking you ever so sweetly if you’d like to give to the Children’s Fund for Lost Socks, Shoes, and Gloves. “Uh What?”

Telemarketing guy says, “Ma’am, I’m sure you’ve seen the billboards on the highway with the picture of a single lonely shoe on the back porch or the story of the single white sock among the pile of black ones on the radio. Well winter is here and we’d like to try to match up as many socks, shoes, and gloves for as many kids as possible so their little fingers and toes don’t freeze up and fall off. Can I put you down for a $50 donation?”

Pause, loading information into the brain… oops needs more ram. You say, “I have to go, could you please just send me the info in the mail and I’ll think about it?”

He says, “Sure, I’ll just need to ask you a few short questions and keep you on the phone another 30 min or until you are so annoyed your head explodes. Whichever comes first.”

The moral of the story is don’t bug people unless they bug you first. Come back next time and maybe there will be something to talk about, but maybe not. Y’all come back now, ya hear!?