Tom Cruise appeared on the Today Show this morning (People). About four years prior, Cruise was all up on Matt Lauer about something-or-other, Brooke Shields, depression, whatever. Man that dude was crazy, off the deep end. And I used to like him, too. I was thinking about the movies he was in.

The dude starred in so many movies you can’t keep track of them anymore. I tried, and then at some point he just became an insane psycho and I stopped caring. He used to be my film idol. If I were to be a film actor, he was my aspiration. Then Scientology came along and ruined him. But there were the old days, weren’t there, when he wasn’t some crazy dude who jumped on couches and lightning bolted Oprah? Remember them?

Remember when he raced the car? Flew the F-16 or whatever fighter jet that was? Remember when he rode the motorcycle? (Or was that Charlie Sheen, I forget now.)

Remember when he did the impossible in a mission? Served drinks at a bar? Ran down the street? Went crazy and shot up cadets?

Remember when he was a hermit in some fantasy land? Remember when he ran down the street to catch his wife? Wore a fat suit and danced? Came to love his retarded brother? Remember when he hid from futuristic spider drones while blind?

Remember when he was a young hotshot lawyer? A deadbeat lawyer? Masterminded the assassination of Hitler? Ran through the city chasing Jamie Foxx with a gun?

Remember when he rode the horse and staked his claim on the land? Danced in his underwear? Played pool? Screamed, “THERE IS NO MURDER!” and ran through a building?

Remember when he ran through Shanghai?

What do you remember?